Jubilo

Tonight when there isn’t any chocolate

Or a guitar to strum, or a nib to scratch,

Or a book to read, or a plan to distract

I’m fully occupied with being sad.

There are these other women, Plaisir

Whom I care about, whom I adore,

With whom I share the most intimate secrets

About my thoughts of you.

But they aren’t you. And it is grossly unfair.

That even tonight, after so much love

I must still think of you, must still have you.

You’re still the only one, Jubilo.

The thought of you makes me want to vomit.

Being with someone else is an exercise is comparisons.

And zoo, zoo are unaware! Are zoo not?

But you are the reason for every heart I’ve broken.

I don’t think you will ever be mine.

It is a horrible, sinking feeling that should never accompany love.

It’s a crazy love song, my life.

I tell every beautiful face I’m hers forever. Filthy lies.

I know there are better women

But none of them is you.

None of them makes me, me

The way you do.

I’m stuck, goddammit. I can’t pull out.

Why don’t you just die on me one of these days?

Drop off the face of the earth and never tell anyone,

So I can live in peace, so I can get unglued.

I’m stuck, goddammit. I can’t pull out.

Just love me honey, and make it all simpler,

For me and everyone I pretend to love

Because this, this is plain torture.

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